So when is a baby not a baby anymore?

My third child, born last May, will probably always be my "baby".

But before my very eyes he has now become a little boy.

I can't put my finger on the exact moment I realised he had "grown-up".

Maybe when he started to walk it hit me that he was no longer the tiny baby I left hospital with 18 months ago.

I have to say I am full of mixed emotions.

I am sad that my little baby is growing up. We are pretty certain that he is the last baby, its kind of the end of an era.

But on the other hand I am loving the extended chunks of quality sleep - hallelujah!!

I am also fascinated everyday watching his development and seeing the world through his eyes.

I also love the fact I can communicate better with my little man.

When he was a baby (well... younger) it was endless questions back and forth between my husband and I (well actually between me and anyone who was in a 5 metre radius of me and my screaming child) oh and not forgetting the numerous calls to my mum...

Do you think he's hungry? Maybe he's got wind? No I think he's in pain, what do you think? Could be a dirty nappy.

I dont know arrrggghhh???

But now I can ask him things. The answer is usually "No". Come to think of it 9 times out of 10 the answer is no (all my children seem to love that word) but at least he communicates and gives me a better idea of what is going on.

Even after 3 kids I am no baby whisperer - I wish.

It seems like a distant (blurry) memory - and I hear a collective squel of "She can't be serious" from all those new mums and dads..... sleepless nights, feeding every 3 hours (and then some), bizarre nappy monitoring - how many wees? How many poos? What colour? What consistency? (apologies to my father who when he reads this will declare far to much information. A super grandad but just can't handle poo conversation - love you dad!). And lets not forget the constant guessing games of is he too hot, too cold, to wrap or not to wrap. And then there is breastfeeding which I personally  struggled with (but persisted with for all my children). When I had my first baby I assumed breastfeeding was just something that came naturally. But to my shock and sometimes horror - like when my first son regurgitated blood tinged milk from drinking breastmilk from my cracked, bleeding and very very sore nipples! - I  realised this breastfeeding gig does not come naturally to all....and in amongst those first few months the exhaustion, questioning your choices, actions and decisions and wondering whether you are a good mother? What happened to my life? And thinking will I ever be able to have 5 minutes to myself let alone a shower.

Will this ever end? Yes, it does.

Before I go I want to say a huge congratulations to Holly & Neil who welcomed a liitle bundle of joy named Myles into the world recently. To you both and to all the new parents out there - Enjoy every moment - good and bad because trust me one day you will blink, open your eyes and look at your little man or lady and say "Where did my baby go?"

My baby Lachlan.

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